Signs Of Abuse

If in danger, immediately dial 911

Signs you are in an abusive relationship.

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Do you:

Feel afraid of your partner?
Avoid certain topics out of fear of annoying/angering your partner?
Wonder if you are crazy?
Feel emotionally numb or helpless?
Believe that your actions cause you to be mistreated?
Blame yourself for their behavior?
Tolerate unwanted behaviors?

Does your partner:

Ignore or put down your opinions or accomplishments?
Prevent or discourage you from seeing your family or friends?
Prevent you from continuing or furthering your education?
Prevent you from securing employment?
Constantly check up on you?
Accuse you of flirting or being too friendly?
Humiliate, belittle, criticize or insult you in front of others?
Push, slap, chokes, bite, shove or hit you?
Destroy your belongings?
Deny the abuse and blame you for their violent outburst/behaviors?
Hurt or threaten to hurt your children?
Limit your finances to avoid you buying important items?
Threaten to hurt himself or herself?
Blame the alcohol or drugs for their behavior?
See you as property/sex object rather than a partner?

Victims may experience various emotions and feelings when deciding to leave the abusive relationship that may include:

Want the abuse to end, but not the relationship
Feel isolated, depressed, helpless or shame
Unaware of the available services
Embarrassed or emotionally withdrawn
Fear of being judged if they reveal the abuse to others
Deny, minimize, or make excuses for the abuser
Loves their abuser, or financially dependent
Lack of trust in others
Distance themselves from family or friends
Be impulsive or aggressive
Feel guilt related to the relationship
Suffer with anxiety or suicidal thoughts
Abuse alcohol or drugs
Hopeful that their abuser will change
Have religious, cultural, or other beliefs that reinforce staying in the relationship
No support from friends of family
Fear cultural, community, or societal backlash that may hinder escape or support
Fearful of children’s safety
Have had unsupportive experiences with friends, family, employers, law enforcement, courts, child protective services, etc.

If you or anyone you know may be experiencing domestic abuse, please seek help. Lives are depending on it. Remember, abuse also affects children, family, friends, co-workers, religious communities, neighbours, etc.

Tina T Laws



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